Chocolate or Vanilla
by SpamLord
Summary: Craig takes Tweek to an unknown destination, and Tweek isn't too happy... TweekCraig for Tara. Slash, almostsmut


My pointless bordering on smutty Tweek/Craig for Tara. :D

Disclaimer: Tweek and Craig aren't mine. And I don't really want Nathaniel. You can have him.  
Warning: Slash, icky stuffffff, pointlessness

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I hated having my eyes covered. I didn't know where I was going. For all I know, I'm being led to a government laboratory where I'll be used as a guinea pig, or I'm being led off to the port where I'll be sold into slavery, or-

"Tweek, we're here." Thank the gods it wasn't an impostor. I felt him leading me out of the car, and onto what I assumed was the sidewalk. I reached up and scratched at the black cloth. It was itchy. "Ready Tweek? Tada!" he exclaimed, tearing the blindfold off my face, and I shrieked in horror. The pink neon lights burned the words "XXX SEX SHOP" into my head. The windows were tinted black, and it was impossible to see what was inside.

"What? Craig, what are we doing here?" I squeaked, trembling.

"Calm down, we just need some lube. Don't have a heart attack." He opened the door, and stepped calmly inside as if it were nothing. I followed him, ready to run at the slightest sign of danger. It was obvious we weren't old enough, but he just kept on going. There was a man at the counter, a magazine in his left hand, his other… I'd rather not think about it.

"Hey! You're not old enough to be in here!" he snapped at me. Apparently he was good at multi-tasking.

"Gah! Please don't throw me in jail!"

"Tweek, calm down! Don't mind him Nath, he's with me," Craig said. He wasn't angry, but his voice had authority.

"Oh, sorry, didn't know you were with Craig. Go on," he drifted off as he returned to his activities. Craig headed for a shelf on his left. He knew where he was going. I looked nervously at him. He had a grin on his face; he was enjoying himself. I sighed, and looked at the shelf, pretending to be interested.

"You wanna try the flavoured stuff this time Tweekers?" he asked casually.

"What? No, that's disgusting Craig! What are you supposed to do with flavoured lube anyways?" I regretted asking immediately.

"Well, Tweek, if you think about it…"

"I didn't WANT to think about it Craig!" I gasped out. I needed my inhaler…

"Jeez Tweek, I was just asking." His eyes returned to the lube, and he pulled down two different tubes.

"Chocolate or vanilla?"

"CRAIG!" I screamed.

"Okay, okay." He placed both back on the shelf, and grabbed a tube of what I hoped was just lube. He started towards the counter, and stopped. "Hey Tweek…" Oh no. He had that tone in his voice, that told me he was about to ask for something dirty. "Since we're here, why don't we take a look around?"

"Craig, you have no idea how afraid I am of everyone and everything in here. Let's just go."

"Fine…" he said sadly. I almost felt bad for him. He walked up to the counter, and laid a 10 dollar bill on the counter. The man took the bill with his right hand, and fumbled through the register. "That's ok, you can keep the change." Craig took the tube, and placed it in his pocket. He walked me to the door, and opened it for me. I stepped outside, only to be picked up from behind.

"Craig! Let go of me! CRAIG!"

"Tweek, you're gonna have fun here whether you like or not," he said sternly, carrying me further into the store. He put me down, and laid his hands on my shoulders, to make sure I wouldn't run away. I looked around me, and saw some of the most horrible things I had ever seen. Whips, vibrators, handcuffs; you name it, it was there. I think I even saw a spiked dildo, and prayed to all the gods I knew that that wasn't what Craig had in mind. He pulled a whip off the shelf, and cracked it in the air, narrowly missing the lights. I winced every time he cracked it.

"Craig, put it back!"

"If you insist." He folded up the whip, and placed it back on the hook. He looked around devilishly, like a kid in a candy store… of sex. I guess he saw something he liked, because he rushed over to it. He fumbled around for a second, and pulled out a purple corset and panties.

"Perfect!" he exclaimed.

"Are you sure you'd fit into those Craig?" I asked.

"Oh, they aren't for me." Uh-oh. Before I knew it, I was in the change room, trying on a purple corset and panties. I peeked out from behind the curtain, to Craig's waiting eyes. "You finished in there?"

"Yeah, but I look stupid!" I protested. He stood up, pulled back the curtain, and his jaw dropped. I pulled the curtain back, and quickly changed into my regular clothing. I threw the lingerie on the floor, but I could have sworn I saw Craig pick it up and stuff it in his pocket. I sighed. It's a good thing I love him…

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Thanks for reading! I love comments of all shapes and sizes! giggle Sizes. 

Song list:  
AM-3P - KTz  
Improper Dancing - Electric Six  
Rock and Roll Evacuation - Electric Six  
Naked Pictures - Electric Six  
Dance Epidemic - Electric Six  
Vibrator - Electric Six  
Boy or Girl - Electric Six  
Bite Me - Electric Six  
I'm the Bomb - Electric Six  
Gay Bar - Electric Six  
Future Boys - Electric Six


End file.
